Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Editorial: What Happened To Mr. Nezzer?

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

I know that lately I've been going on and on about the Veggietales character Mr. Nezzer.

However, there's one thing that bugs me. So let me put this into perspective here.
In my three-part editorial of the Netflix series Veggietales In The House, I explained how and why the character Mr. Nezzer was replaced with another character.

However, looking at the last few appearances on Veggietales, you may notice that he's missing some hair and that he sometimes dresses more like an elderly person.

I just saw it as a progression, and suddenly had this thought: Did something happen to him? I mean, by now, some of us already know that Mr. Nezzer was booted off the show because creator Phil Vischer (a white guy) wasn't allowed to play a black stereotype, since that was apparently against the rules at DreamWorks.
-Seriously, look up the video on that debate.
-By the way, to this day, I'm still blown out of my ass upon learning that Mr. Nezzer was a black stereotype. I had never thought of that.
However, how would you explain Mr. Nezzer's termination to kids? What would you tell them? Would you tell them that Mr. Nezzer died of cancer?
-That may seem likely, because over time in the regular Veggietales series, he lost some hair, or just went completely bald. One may think that as chemo-therapy. Others might say that he's simply aging.
Or, would you tell them that he quit his job?
-I think not.

So, looking at this issue as if we were in the Veggietales universe itself, what happened to Mr. Nezzer? Well, that's pretty much open for debate.

The regular Veggietales series doesn't really explain what has happened to Mr. Nezzer. And not once, I don't think, did any of the characters look us in the eye and say that he died or got fired from the show.
-Trust me. This show wouldn't do that. If they did, then that would be a controversy that would surpass that of the Rack, Shack, and Benny video.

(Refer to "The Bunny Song," and how many times it had to be edited, due to the angry letters from viewers.)
Since the show itself gives no set-in-stone explanation to what really happened to Mr. Nezzer that the rest of the characters may be concerned, it's basically open for any theory.

Whatsoever Critic
Sources:
Veggietales In The House
Veggietales

Courtesy: Big Idea/DreamWorks

Sunday, January 11, 2015

CHARACTER ANALYSIS #11- Rumor Weed from "LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed"

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

This would be my fourth Character Analysis on a LarryBoy villain. Yep, it's the Rumor Weed from LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed.

The Rumor Weed, like the Fib from Outer Space, is one of the monsters that LarryBoy pins up against in the franchise. As far as personality goes, she's one-dimensional. In that whole amount of screen time that she's in, you know that she's evil and doesn't care about anyone. That's right! She's there to take over Bumblyburg, and will stop at nothing to do so.

She gets her start whenever someone starts a rumor about another person, which in this case, two kids start a rumor about LarryBoy's butler, Alfred Asparagus.

Once the rumor spreads all over town, Alfred finds himself in turmoil as far as reputation goes.

This allows the Rumor Weed to capture him at the movie's climax.
However, what stops her from taking over is...
-...not LarryBoy saving the day.

(Sorry to say. At least he made an attempt. Don't judge him,)
...but the two kids that started the rumor righting their wrong, and people saying nice things about Alfred.

Now, as far as looks go, she's usually seen with yellow hair, big sunglasses, and (I'm dead serious about this) big lips that someone will say is liposuction.
-Yeah! Disturbing!
-And plus, she's like a stereotypical gossip girl, except she's really a supernatural creature.

Now, one of the problems I had with this character is her origin. What did the movie want us to think where she came to existence? In the opening scene, after LarryBoy takes down a lowlife bandit, Larry knocks down a potted plant, which gets electrocuted on a power line, and then falls into a gutter and into the sewer.
-So power lines can give inanimate objects life?
Even though the movie shows us how the Rumor Weed came to life, I still don't think that that fully explains what she is and where she came from.
Another problem I have with her is the collateral damage she causes. Oooh, she redecorates the entire city with her stems and leaves. Oooh, that's hard it do!

I mean, what happened to the messing up sidewalks and crashing through walls like Alfred had mentioned in that one scene? Why doesn't she do all that? Then again, showing her doing that kind of destruction would test the G-rating environment (or NR-rating) of this movie.

But aside from that, I enjoyed seeing this villain in the LarryBoy realm. She's serious; she's capable of doing diabolical things; and she's ballsy.

Whatsoever Critic
Source: LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed

Courtesy: Big Idea/DreamWorks

Saturday, January 10, 2015

CHARACTER ANALYSIS #10- Dr. Blowhole from "Penguins of Madagascar" TV Show

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

I'm very honored to do a Character Analysis on today's character. I had gone on and on about this character in this blog, and was appalled that he wasn't in the 2014 movie Penguins of Madagascar. If you haven't guessed it yet, I'm talking about Dr. Blowhole.

Seeing that I've reviewed all three of his appearances in the Penguins of Madagascar TV Show, then you probably already know what this character is about. So, I'm just going to give you a run-through.

Dr. Blowhole is one of the antagonists on the show.

Ever since his first full appearance on the special "Dr. Blowhole's Revenge," everyone that watched this show knew who he was.

He was charming, in a villainous way.

He was diabolical, in a way more worthy than most villains that I've heard of.
-This is the only villain that I'm semi-obsessed with.
Plus, he's voiced by Neil Patrick Harris. This is a really good advantage, because Harris has played villains before, and... HE CAN SING!!!!

-How is it that this villain isn't a heart-throb? No offense, Loki...

Aside from his personality, Dr. Blowhole has done so many diabolical things... which are pretty cool in villain standards.

He invents things; he plans attacks;

and he's loving every minute of it.
-Did I mention that he can sing?

Nothing too bad about this character, except that he can be awkward sometimes. He has a habit for mugging the camera no matter what scene he's in.







He may start with one diabolical plan at first, but then jump to another one as soon as something else is tossed his way.
-And no, he is NOT bipolar!!!

Anyway, Dr. Blowhole is, by far, the coolest villain that I know and appreciate. Nothing would ever change that. Just like LarryBoy is my favorite superhero of all time, Dr. Blowhole is my favorite supervillain of all time.

As I've said before, it was sad to see that he's not the villain in the 2014 Penguins of Madagascar movie. The villain that they threw out to us is a...
-....Well, expect a review from me on that movie, and you will know how I feel about it.

Whatsoever Critic
Source: Penguins of Madagascar (TV Show)

Courtesy: DreamWorks Animation

Friday, January 9, 2015

Whatsoever Critic's Top 10 Favorite "Five Nights at Freddy's" Animatronics

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

Yes, I go on and on about the Five Nights at Freddy's series.

Yeah! It's a great game franchise! It's a masterpiece, anything great to come from the video game market!
However, I have yet to tell y'all which animatronic character is my favorite thus far in this video game series. Well, today, I'm here to bring you my Top 10 favorite Five Nights at Freddy's characters!
-Yeah, 10. I thought there were only 7 characters, but corrected myself and said 10.
Let's get started!

10. Balloon Boy (Five Nights at Freddy's 2)

Not much to say about this character, but that he holds balloons and has an annoying voice. Whenever he says "Hi" or "Hello?", it's like he wants to get under your skin.

One thing I like about this guy, though, is the outfit. It's so retro, and it's cutesy.

-I can totally see that as a kids' costume for Halloween.
What's unique about Balloon Boy is that he doesn't really attack you like the other animatronics do. Even though he laughs and says things, and eventually gets into your office to annoy you even more, he doesn't attack you.

-Is that a good or a bad thing?

9. Toy Freddy (Five Nights at Freddy's 2)

This is only a newer version of Freddy Fazbear. It's kind of cutesy, but it is what it is. In this game, he's one of the animatronics that appear to you during Night 1, unlike old Freddy who usually appears on Night 3 and so on.

He may be like one of the easy characters to come across, because compared to him, the older models and Foxy are brutal.
-Just a theory...

8. Chica the Chicken (Five Nights at Freddy's 1 & 2)

When I first saw this character, I was like, "Wow! That's a whacked-out bird!" The selfie-worthy looks that this bird will give you will make it hard to take this character seriously.


Plus, she wears a bib saying "Let's Eat" and holds a cupcake to highlight that statement.
-Just think of her as a bizarre Helen Henny (Chuck E. Cheese reference).
As far as I know, she may be the one that would go inside the kitchen (the camera that's usually disabled in the first game).
In FNAF 2 though, Chica appears in Night 3 and so on.

Plus, she is seen as damaged and deformed, with her hands missing (replaced with strings of wiring)

and ready to scare people with her open mouth and wide eyes.

-I'm not sure why I scored Chica higher than Balloon Boy, because she may be creepier than some of the other animatronics.

Maybe because she does more than Balloon Boy?

7. Freddy Fazbear (Five Nights at Freddy's 1 & 2)

Just because he's the title character of the game, doesn't necessarily mean that he's my favorite character in this video game franchise.

With a signature top hat, bow tie, and microphone, he's the man (or bear) of action when scaring the player into being shoved into an empty Freddy suit.
In the first game, Freddy's jumpscares consist of him appearing whenever the power runs out, and he gets you in the dark.
In the second game though, he appears in Night 3 and so on.

I don't really see him as threatening as the first game, because it was just him and three other characters (Bonnie, Chica, and Foxy). Here, there's more animatronics to worry about, so it's kind of hard to focus on the title character.

6. The Marionette (Five Nights at Freddy's 2)

I'm just starting to learn more about this character. So far, I know that the Marionette resides in the prize counter room as a jack-in-the-box type of animatronic, and you have to wind a music box every so often to keep him away.

However, some people are theorizing that the Marionette is somebody that got possessed into becoming the Marionette. Others say that this character may be the one manipulating things, or has killed people before, due to the glitches (minigames) that happen every once in a while after the player "dies."
Plus, in the cutscenes, as you go further and further into the game, you'll come across the Marionette following your gaze as you look through the Freddy mask and see Bonnie and Chica on stage with you.
-What does the Marionette have to hide?
The reason why I didn't score him too low or too high is because I'm curious about this character, but I don't think he's my number one pick.

5. Bonnie the Bunny (Five Nights at Freddy's 1 & 2)

He's the animatronic with the guitar on stage with Freddy and Chica.
-When I first played this game, I thought he was gonna hit me with the guitar, but that was just a prop.
Well, Bonnie must be Freddy's right-hand man, because he usually the first animatronic to come off the stage to go after you in the first game.

According to the game's wiki page, he's said to have the ability to teleport(?) from room to room in order to get to the office...
-... or maybe it's just a rumor, because I find that hard to believe. Why? Because you usually see Foxy running, and not anyone else in this game.
Plus, Bonnie's jumpscare is basically just screaming in your face while dry-humping...
-Well, what do you call his jumpscare? [Fill in your own punch line here], because I don't know.

Anyway, in the sequel, Bonnie is seen with his face mauled off, and he's missing an arm. And when the office lights flicker, you know to put on the Freddy mask, so that he won't get you. However, his jumpscare is him grabbing you by the throat.
-So basically, he's very fond of the Liam Neeson method of killing people: death by neck-breaking.

4. Toy Chica (Five Nights at Freddy's 2)

Yeah, I know what you're thinking. She looks slim, too slim for kids' restaurant standards...
And you can look around on Youtube and see that people compare her to people like Nicki Minaj and Iggy Azalea.
-Big thighs and a slim figure... What does this game want from women? It's like saying, "Oooh, look at who we've created. This is your role model, kids. Be like them!" It's subtle, yet disturbing.

I place Toy Chica as number four in the countdown, because I'm not really fond of her, but at the same time, I envy her. I'll admit, I may not come close to Toy Chica's "look,"

but at least Helen Henny (Chuck E. Cheese reference) keeps it G-rated.
Anyway, her bib reads "Let's Party"...
-Again, Helen Henny is more G-rated than this...
...you'll usually see Toy Chica standing in the hallway...
-Come on, guys! What happened to keeping this G-rated?!
...She also crawls in the vents to get into the office...

-You know what? Number three...

3. Toy Bonnie (Five Nights at Freddy's 2)

Speaking of looks, check out the new look that was given to Bonnie. Toy Bonnie is blue with green eyes and...
-...eyelashes?
... and he crawls into the vents like Toy Chica and some others.

But wait! He holds a guitar at some point once he gets off stage.

-I mean, that's pretty cool. It looks like he's about to serenade to you before he goes after you. (Hee hee.)
Toy Bonnie's approach is, by far, one of the most bizarre, because when you put the Freddy mask on and the lights flicker, he just slides into view momentarily and disappears.

-Wouldn't it be funny if he held up two fingers (a peace sign) as he came into view?
Anyway, his jumpscare is just him jumping at you with wide eyes...

-Okay, that's similar to Chica's jumpscare in this game. Moving on!

2. The Mangle (Five Nights at Freddy's 2)

This character, like the Marionette, is heavily theorized and debated on. First of all, how can anyone think that this character is a boy, when in actuality, this thing wears make-up, wears lipstick, and has eyelashes?

-It's definitely a girl.
Anyway, the Mangle is said to be the restaurant's take-apart-put-together attraction for the kids...
-Were video games and ski ball machines too expensive? I mean, how can that be if they had a "small fortune" to make Toy Freddy, Toy Bonnie, and Toy Chica?

Also, she was said to have been a newer version of Foxy, but I guess Scott Cawthon decided to have two fox animatronics instead of one.
To me, this animatronic is very intriguing, because of the theories that people come up with. She's said to have a unique voice box that's supposed to call the police whenever danger is near, but can't, because she's been tampered with...
-Again... was the take-apart-put-back-together attraction idea necessary?
But I just don't know why that is. People theorized so much in this game that it's hard to pinpoint the truth here.

Anyway, I placed this character as the runner-up, because I'm intrigued, and she looks pretty badass for a character.
-Take that, Toy Chica! How dare you try to throw out a statement saying that looks are everything!

1. Foxy the Pirate Fox (Five Nights at Freddy's 1 & 2)

I'll let you in on a secret: Of all the characters in the Five Nights at Freddy's franchise, this is the animatronics that I fantasize a lot on.
-I had a dream once that I was dressed like him for Halloween. True story, don't judge me.
Anyway, by now, if you're familiar with this game, you know that he runs at you to get into your office unlike the other characters...
-Bonnie was originally the one that was supposed to run (as shown in the trailer), but the running ability was given to Foxy. (I guess Scott Cawthon wanted to surprise us with a fourth animatronic, instead of there being three.)
Plus, in the first game, he usually resides in Pirate Cove... UNTIL HE DECIDES TO RUN TO YOU AT FULL FORCE!!
-Hee hee.
Come the sequel, whenever you see him in the hallway, you have to flash your light at him, so that you can reset him or something like that, that way he won't attack you then and there.

However, if he's lucky, he'll lunge at you full-force.
-To be, that's very ballsy. You'd think that the title character is the most ballsy of all the characters, but no. Foxy takes the cake!
The sequel makes it unclear where Foxy resides inside the restaurant until he makes his way to the office. Does he stick with the old animatronics inside this one room? Or does he share a room with the Mangle?
Anyway, of all the animatronics in the series, I think that Foxy is the coolest!

Whatsoever Critic
Sources:
Five Nights at Freddy's
Five Nights at Freddy's 2
Chuck E. Cheese (that one pic)

Courtesy: Scott Cawthon and CEC Entertainment