Mystery Review #3...

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

Say, remember my four clues for my mystery review that I'm going to have here? You know...
1. A person with an inanimate object
2. Expecting the unexpected, but getting something else...
3. S***'s going down!
4. Guy in yellow

Well, today those things will be present in this review. You'll see, because they'll be italicized and bold in the text. However, I will confess about one of the hints...

Guy in yellow... AND PURPLE!

Let's dive into the LarryBoy vs. the Milk Money Bandit scene from LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed!

DISCLAIMER: I already a review of this movie, so if you haven't read it yet, feel free to check that out before or after reading his blog post.

Beginning of the Scene:
Here we have two peas walking home from a movie theater.

Pea #1: "That was a lousy movie!"
-By the way, this scene had to be recycled from the opening scene from LarryBoy and the Fib from Outer Space, because both opening scenes are identical, except that this time around, the film at the theater sucked big time for the peas. Yeah, that would be my reaction too when I finished seeing a bad movie at a theater. Taken 3, Tammy... they were shit.

Anyway, all is okay, sort of... as the peas talk about the movie they just saw. But a shadow stalks them at every corner (almost).

-I mean, this dude isn't even trying to look like he's stalking these two kids.

Sure, he may be lurking in the shadows, but come on. I betcha one of the kids may have still seen him from their peripheral vision at some point! Then again, the kids aren't paying attention to their surroundings.
The pair then stops and one of them makes a reference to the Fib from Outer Space video:

Pea #2: "Hey, do you remember what we saw the last time we were here?"
-(mimicking that Pea) Yeah, we got to make a reference to the Fib incident, because... it's been about a year or so since that shit went down.

The two kids stare at the night sky momentarily, until their stalker comes out of nowhere and asks for money.
-This is a moment of expecting the unexpected, but getting something else. You know... the kids thought they were remembering the Fib incident (thanks to the movie's idea of recycling plots from past videos), but instead of an alien falling from the sky, they get a bandit demanding for spare change of all things.
Pea #2: (by the way, this is Percy Pea. I looked it up) "We're not supposed to talk to strangers. And no, I don't have any extra money."
But the bandit doesn't buy it, but instead intimidates the kids.
Milk Money Bandit: "Oh, really? Well how about... a dollar and twenty-eight cents?"
Percy Pea: "Wha...? How did you know I had that?"
-Now for the next part of this scene, how much you want to bet that this is considered stalking of a child?

Milk Money Bandit: "I've been watching you, kid! Every Monday morning, your mom gives you a dollar and twenty-eight cents... and I want it!"
-So, not only was he stalking these kids, but he's just a lazy bastard that he chooses to steal $1.28 over a gaming console or whatever else is expensive. What a prick! Preying on people smaller than him...

So the bandit steals the money...
-...uh... he steals the money off-screen...
...and he taunts the kids from the rooftop.

Milk Money Bandit: "Ha ha! See you later, boys! I hope you like water with your lunches!"
-This guy shouldn't live. He's that bad, guys.
-But don't worry, guys. Things get interesting...

Suddenly, we see the bandit see something emerge from a billboard.
: )

-Even the shadows on LarryBoy's face look pretty awesome. Good job, Big Idea.
LarryBoy: "I believe you have something that belongs to those boys."
-S***'s going down! (Told ya!)

Milk Money Bandit: "Who are you?"
LarryBoy: "I'm LarryBoy."
-Now this part was the most anticipating. Now I know that this is like a LarryBoy alternative to Batman saying his name to a crook, but it definitely fits the atmosphere of this scene. There's so much emotion put into this scene that I wouldn't be doing this review if there was none.
-True story: I remember when I was eleven, and I used to watch this movie over and over. One of the reasons why is because I looked forward to this scene with LarryBoy and the Milk Money Bandit. It was that good.

So LarryBoy attacks the Milk Money Bandit with one plunger ear, and has the bad guy dangle from the edge of the rooftop.

-Now one pretty interesting thing about this scene was something that I've found when pausing it at one point, when LarryBoy is about to attack with his plunger ear. Yeah, this was something that I came across and didn't expect something like that/ It's like his eyes were missing pupils for a second. But, I won't go too deep into this absurdity just yet; that would be for another blog post.

-Next, there's one second in the attack bit where it looks like the Milk Money Bandit was fighting back, but gives in. The bandit can be seen kicking LarryBoy in the chest until he's being dangled from the rooftop.

Milk Money Bandit: "What are you gonna do?"
LarryBoy: "It's not nice to take people's milk money."
-You hear that, bandit? You shouldn't have been a pussy by stealing from people that are smaller than you.

Then LarryBoy turns the Milk Money Bandit upside-down, and...

-...is it me, or is that bandit getting some strain in his head. If you were to time how long it takes from the moment LarryBoy turns him upside-down to when he turns him right-side-up again, you can see that it took 22.90 seconds that bandit was upside-down that whole time. That's a huge headache, but he deserved it.

The kids are looking up at the rooftop to see what is going on.

Milk Money Bandit: "Take it easy! Don't get crazy!"
-Um, crazy is stealing from a pair of kids, asshole.
-And plus, LarryBoy doesn't need to "take it easy," because he's bringing you to justice... asshole.

Eventually, LarryBoy shakes the bad guy, until the kids' money falls out of his pockets and onto the ground.

LarryBoy turns him right-side-up afterwards.
Milk Money Bandit: "I ain't feelin' so good..."

-No shit, Sherlock.

LarryBoy then takes him behind a billboard to drop him off into a police car, startling Officer Scooter.

-By the way... A person with an inanimate object. An anthropomorphic gourd holding a flower. Ha! All of my hints revealed!
-And plus, this is a good angle to shoot this bit. The billboard. The setup. Awesome.
Officer Scooter: "It's the Milk Money Bandit. We've been looking for you for months."

-How is this bandit that hard to capture? He steals the lamest things. He stalks children. And the movie itself makes him too obvious a bad guy. How can authorities miss somebody like him for that long? You'd think the police would have wanted posters for this guy!
Officer Scooter: "Thanks, LarryBoy!"
The scene ends with the officer thanking LarryBoy, even though the superhero isn't around anymore.

And that was one of the most epic scenes of the LarryBoy universe.
I think Big Idea outdid himself in 1999. I think they did a bang-up job on the animation, the music, and the theatrics. Sure, some of the stuff may seem like a parody of superheroes like Batman, but hey! LarryBoy is much more enjoyable to watch than Batman.
-And I'm not lying when I say that LarryBoy is my all-time favorite superhero. Enough said.

Whatsoever Critic
Source: LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed

Courtesy: Big Idea Entertainment

"Don't Hug Me I'm Scared 3" Youtube Video Review

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

1 and 2 were pretty cool to watch. But what about the third?

If you were to ask your mother about what love is, and she only spewed out drunken nonsense to you for more than five minutes, then this is what she'll say... but in video form.
-Just a side note: I'm trying to get this review done, so that I can review Don't Hug Me I'm Scared 4, because that fourth one recently came out this past March (2015).
-And if you haven't seen me react to Don't Hug Me I'm Scared 4, then the links to the React video and the original video are below:

Reaction video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekNh01Uijrc

Original video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9FGgwCQ22w

So let's get started! This is Don't Hug Me I'm Scared 3!

Opening:

The video opens with a missing persons poster of our three main characters... who are clearly NOT missing, because they partake in a picnic of... eggs and raw chicken legs.
-Why would the green bird be eating a chicken leg if he himself is a bird? Unless he's a buzzard or vulture, it isn't going to work!
-By the way, I looked up what these characters are in Wikipedia. I won't address them by what fans are dubbing them, because their names aren't confirmed by the show's creators yet.

Yellow Guy sees a butterfly and enjoys its presence, until Green Bird, like a dumbass, uses a fly-swatter to kill the butterfly.

Green Bird: "Pesky bee!"

-This guy can't tell the different between a butterfly and a bee. I mean, look at it! It's so obviously a butterfly!

This, of course, upsets Yellow Guy, and he runs away from the scene crying. 

Red Guy: "I wonder what would happen."

-(imitating Red Guy) My monotone voice won't give away the answer, so this statement is basically telling you to keep watching and find out.

Next Scene:

We see Yellow Guy crying until a large butterfly shows up and gives him words of comfort.

Butterfly: "It makes you sad, doesn't it?"

Yellow Guy: "A little baby pigeon..."

-Is it weird to say that all I'm focused on in this scene is what that "D" on his overalls means?

Butterfly: (singing) "Have you ever wondered why we're here?"

-By now, I'm used to the fact that the Don't Hug Me I'm Scared series has these inanimate objects (or creature, in this case) that sing to our main characters.

Butterfly: (singing) "...harmony."

("Harmony" spelled in the clouds like this: HARMUNEE)

-Why is "harmony" misspelled? That doesn't seem right.

Musical number continues...

So the butterfly takes Yellow Guy through the clouds, while girly My Little Pony backwash plays in the background. The colors swirl; the clouds talk; and CG effects reign supreme.

Yellow Guy: "What is love? Is it in the sky?"

Cloud: "No. It's a feeling deep inside."

Yellow Guy: "Because I'm hungry..."

Butterfly: (singing) "No, you're lonely. I can see it in your eyes."

So, where are our other main characters? Still at the picnic...

Green Bird: "Oh look! There he goes flying through the sky!"

He and Red Guy debate whether or not to catch up with Yellow Guy, but they eventually decide to stay and eat the eggs and chicken (which clearly has a fly on one chicken leg).

-Was the fly coincidence or on purpose?

The "love" world

Yellow Guy is then introduced to the other animals and people that live in this "love" world.

(Yellow Guy petting a furry animal)

Fury Animal: "He he, harder!"

-Okay, that was weird. Was that animal orgasming?

Back at the picnic...

The picnic is finished, and Green Bird and Red Guy finally decide to catch up with their friend.

Green Bird: "And we have finished the chicken picnic."

(Green Bird pauses)

-Line?

-He just stares into the camera, as if to say, "Uh, got any more lines for me? Or are you all just going to make me stand here like an idiot?"

Back at the musical number...

Yellow Guy learns more about love by loving everything in site.

Yellow Guy: "I love this tree, and I love this stick..."

But the butterfly tells him about saving one's love for that "special one"...

-...who looks like Wimzie (Wimzie's House) in 20 years...

and then a tree tells Yellow Guy a story about a boy named Michael.

-Now if you think that this short story will mean anything at all in this video, then take a listen to this:

Tree: (singing) "This is the story of Michael, the ugliest boy in town, ugly and weak. They called him a freak. He lived on his own underground. He lived on his own underground..."

-Wow, that short story made absolutely no sense whatsoever. What the purpose of having a story like that, when it was going to be a waste of time in the long run?

Then, the musical number takes this weird turnby talking about marriage, and then immediately segwaying into a love cult where people pay tribute to a large head statue named Malcolm...

-Why the statue is named Malcolm is beyond me...

...and Yellow Guy is tied up and subjected to a name-change, brainwashing, and a bizarre promise that he would never be alone...

-Uh... I'm scared(?) Come on! The scares in the first two videos were more memorable than this one!

Wrap Up:

So Yellow Guy eventually wakes up on the same tree branch...

-Did he fall asleep at some point? Or was this a forced deus ex machina, as if the writers said, "Oh, well, we really suck at talking about love, so we're just gonna end the show here."

Green Bird and Red Guy finally catch up with him and appologize for being mean earlier, and they present him with an egg.

Red Guy: "I guess it must be because we love you."

-(mimicking Red Guy) Here's a "fuck you" to Barney the dinosaur and his "I love you" song.

The video ends with an ugly worm popping out of the egg, before Green Bird whacks it with a flyswatter.

Green Bird: "Pesky bee!"

-Dude, look up what a bee looks like.

End Credits:

-I guess we'll end here, because they're just burning down the Malcolm statue. Again, screw this lesson about love.

And that's Don't Hug Me I'm Scared 3. So did it work?

Well, it almost did. However, of all the Don't Hug Me I'm Scared episodes to date, this one was the weakest. It almost worked, but it didn't have as much shock-value to it as the first two episodes. I mean, you can still give this episode credit for its usage of animation, and the subject matter. (Yeah, the bird and the hairy red guy were dicks, except for Yellow Guy). It even lends itself to having some character development: Yellow Guy isn't just a goofy character, but also naive.

Now I know this may not have been the best in the series, but next time, I'm reviewing something better. Here's your first hint until next time:

A person with an inanimate object

Whatsoever Critic

Source: Don't Hug Me I'm Scared 3

Courtesy: Becky Sloan and Joseph Pelling/Blink Industries

"A.D. The Bible Continues" Ep. 1 Review (4/5/15)

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

This past Sunday (Easter) was the premiere of the series A.D. The Bible Continues.

Now I promised you on a reaction video of the trailer to this show that I would see this show; and I did. So how was it? Well, before I go on, warning: SPOILERS!!!

Recap:

The show immediately starts with the crucifixion of Jesus. The show keeps going back and forth, showing backstories of characters like the chief priest Caiaphas, Simon Peter, Judas, another disciple, and Pilate and his wife; and then it returns to Jesus' death and burial.

-Now I'll get to the end of the episode in just a minute.

So now, I will go through each of the characters. So let's go.

Caiaphas

-I'll admit: the show got a decent actor for this one.

Now this character is the chief priest who rallied for Jesus to be put to death, even going as far as bugging Pilate to guard the tomb to ensure that nobody stole the corpse. Now, you can't really blame this guy for expressing much hatred towards Jesus, because he doesn't understand that Jesus was the Son of God.

-Okay, so for each character, I will ask questions that bug me at the end of an episode...

1. Why is Caiaphas shown with a maiden asking him to come to bed? (I thought chief priests couldn't have wives or be sexually-active, because they're supposed to be married to God.)

2. What is up with him bugging Pilate to do everything in his governing power to extinguish the existence of Jesus? (Was having Jesus crucified not enough? And Pilate himself begs this question on the show.)

Simon Peter

So far, we only know that Simon Peter watched from a distance as Jesus died on the cross. Plus, we learn that he didn't do enough to prevent Jesus from dying.

Now, what was new to me was that Simon Peter was asked by a rebel to join the others that are rebelling against the Romans. But Peter turns them down saying, "Those who live by the sword dies by the sword," meaning that violence is not a way to handle an issue.

1. Who was that rebel that Simon Peter spoke to and turned down? (I remember him saying that they were both childhood playmates, but that's all we know.)

Judas

By now, we already know that Judas had betrayed Jesus, and is now regretting it. But the strangest part about this is that the show shows Judas hanging himself soon after we see Jesus die.

1. Why does Judas die after Jesus in this adaptation? (Normally, in adaptations, Judas kills himself before Jesus' crucifixion.)

2. Will we get more backstory from Judas?

Another disciple

We see one disciple interacting with Jesus' mother, another woman, and Simon Peter.

1. Which disciple is this?

Pilate and his wife

Most of the episode revolves around the Pilates, aside from the Herod family (who only get at least 5-10 minutes of screen time). What I found interesting was that Pilate's wife has these dreams foretelling what Jesus is capable of. But all that time, Pilate doesn't listen to the point where he asks a soldier to prove what his wife is saying is true.

1. If wanting to avoid a rebellion, why doesn't Pilate try to compromise with the rebels?

2. Why isn't Pilate supportive of his wife? (Sure, this is the time period when women didn't have much say in anything, but come on! Her dreams are supposed to mean something!)

Now as promised, this is a recap of the end of this episode:

Guards (provided by Pilate, because Caiaphas apparently bitched enough) are at Jesus' tomb at night.

Suddenly, an angel appears, and a bright light shines from the tomb, blinding the guards. Then the episode ends with Caiaphas hearing the news that the tomb is open.

So, how was the show so far. I would say: So far so good.

I would like to give the show credit for putting much thought into this. I mean, these were the same producers that brought you The Bible series. You can tell that they've done their research on this, as much as Mel Gibson did his with The Passion of the Christ. 

It advertised and delivered: the CG effects, the acting, etc. And interestingly enough, I'm looking forward to next week's episode. And yeah, there may have been some unanswered questions... well DUH!!! It's only the first episode.

Whatsoever Critic

Source: A.D. The Bible Continues

Courtesy: NBC/Lightworkers Media

Top 10 Mysteries in the LarryBoy Universe

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

LarryBoy has been through ups and downs throughout the course of the franchise. However, there are so many unanswered questions, when it comes to this superhero. So today, I'm bringing you my Top 10 mysteries thus far in the franchise. For this list, I'm excluding the LarryBoy episode from Veggietales In The House, because so many of these mysteries that I write down existed longer than the ones in "For the Honor of LarryBoy."

Plus, warning: SPOILERS!

10. How did the League of Incredible Vegetables came to be?

There's not much explained about how this group started up. The only explanation we get is when Junior Aspargus tells his friend Laura about the League by saying that other cities had superheroes besides Bumblyburg, and he's listing them by name and super ability.

But how did this group come together exactly? Did they meet up at a local hot spot and said, "Hey, let's collab"?

-And no, they don't go to Sharma at the end.

Just keep in mind that this movie came out months after The Avengers as a parody of the Marvel movie.

That would seem like the biggest piece of evidence as to how these heroes came together. But I don't know. I guess an hour long run time wasn't enough time to shed more light on this mystery.

9. Blob monster? What blob monster?

I decided to shed light on one of the absurdities of LarryBoy and the Yodelnapper.

The monster in question first appears at the beginning of the episode, when people are at a toy store, and stuff is knocked over, thus creating this blob monster.

-I don't know. I guess the writers were starting to run out of ideas for the Cartoon Adventures franchise.

Then, towards the end of the episode, you see this monster again, and he's just chilling with the yodelers... while LarryBoy is still in his clutches.

-I don't know why!

Now here are the following questions about this monster:

-What is it?

-If a kids' chemistry set can create these creepy monsters, why were these sets on sale to begin with, if people knew that it was going to be this dangerous?

-Why is it that no one stops this monster at the end?

-How come no animal control or law enforcement subdued this monster after he's lulled to sleep with LarryBoy's saxophone music?

But you know what? Who cares? You know that those questions aren't gonna be answered anytime soon.

8. Where did that large Angry Eyebrow come from?

This was one of the things that were never explained in LarryBoy and the Angry Eyebrows. It's in that scene where LarryBoy finally confronts Awful Alvin, but is shocked to see this large eyebrow come after him.

Now, my question is... Where did that large eyebrow come from?

Now I know that that big of an eyebrow wouldn't have fit inside that cage that Awful Alvin shows us earlier in the episode. (There's no frickin' way!)

So, when seeing this monster appear all of a sudden, my thought was: Nope! You can't get away with that, movie! And you know why they can't get away with that?

Because it absolutely makes no sense to throw in a monster that's only going to get a few seconds of screen time and is never brought up again.

-That was also one of the things that "The Penguin Who Loved Me" fucked up on when bringing out the Chrome Claw monster and then pulling him back. (Chrome Claw being in the "Brand New Plan" musical number doesn't count, because we were all in Dr. Blowhole's mind at that time.)

And this was something that I pointed out in my review of this movie, because the giant eyebrow was something completely random.

7. Where do the Bad Apple's powers come from?

If you watched LarryBoy and the Bad Apple, you would know that the Bad Apple is tech savvy with her gadgets;

she can spin webs (mostly off-screen);

and she is lethal, because she has these shooting abilities.

More importantly: she's temptation- leading people into their temptations and seducing them.

So... where do her powers come from?

Even though the movie makes it perfectly clear that the Bad Apple resembles temptation...

-The obvious Adam and Eve reference.

However, the movie doesn't say how she got her abilities. Nonetheless, if she supposed to resemble temptation and refer to the biblical Adam and Eve story, we can assumed that she gets her abilities from a darker force.

-I won't dwell on this theory too deeply. So let's move on.

6. What happened to the cool scenic backdrops?

I've bitched about this before in my editorial on Bumblyburg, as well as in previous blog posts, but I'll bring it up again.

The scenic backdrops caught on in LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed,

but they were made much grander, come LarryBoy and the Bad Apple. The backdrops were awesome, and they captured the spirit of the franchise.

Now, the strangest and stupidest thing to happen is that these backdrops are replaced with a dull setting in The League of Incredible Vegetables.

-Wow. Did Big Idea have budget cuts at the time? Or was the Layout & Design team too lazy to put in the scenic backdrops? It's like they just said: Oh, well, we don't want people to ask us anymore to bring back LarryBoy. Oh look! People are seeing that superhero movie, The Avengers. Now's our chance to come up with another story for LarryBoy, so that the fan base can shut the hell up. Scenic backdrops? Who needs those this time around? People want to LarryBoy, because that was what the fanbase kept bitching about, was to see LarryBoy!

Sorry about that rant, but please Big Idea... FOR THE LOVE OF GOD... bring back the scenic backdrops!

5. How come no one questioned the rumor about Alfred Asparagus?

This was a no-brainer when viewing LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed.

When the Rumor Weed goes around to spread the rumor about LarryBoy's butler Alfred, people take it seriously- I mean, they never question why there's a talking weed in their presence; it's like a day in the office for these people!

-If I was one of the people in that movie, I would be asking, "How the fuck does this weed know about this person? And why should we listen to a talking plant that has no business in our yards to begin with?"

But to be fair, the people not questioning the reliability of the Rumor Weed was for the sake of plot. Fair enough.

4. The red Fib

This little monster shows up at the end of LarryBoy and the Fib from Outer Space. It does nothing but make a smooth landing from Earth and then go to a house across the street from Junior's house.

-Oh look! A sequel! 

NOPE! We get LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed two years later. So what was that all about? Big Idea build up this ending... and they don't even take advantage of it?
-So sorry. "LarryBoy and the Fib from Outer Space 2" will not be in the works anytime soon. That doesn't seem right.

3. How come no one noticed Junior Asparagus with a weird alien monster at first?

In LarryBoy and the Fib from Outer Space, we see Junior go into town with the Fib monster, soon after he lies to his dad about who broke a priced bowling plate.
I think people might criticize this as stranger-danger, because if a kid goes along with a strange person (or monster, in this case), then that's definitely stranger-danger.

Like I've mentioned before in both the review and in various blog posts (I think), where are this kid's parents, and why don't they supervise him more when going out with strangers? You'd think someone would be very concerned!
Though, as far as plot goes, the idea of the kid going with a someone he'd just met seemed like a red flag.

2. Does the Fib have an address?
-Yes, people. We're still on the same movie, but bear with me.
I think I've mentioned this before too, but I'll say it again:

All we know about the Fib is that he grows every time a person lies, and he can only be defeated if that person repents and tells the truth.
Now, the biggest mystery of this monster, if not any, is that no explanation is given as to where exactly he came from. The biggest piece of information we're given is that he's from outer space.
-That's obvious, because we see the monster fall from the sky at the beginning of the movie. And plus, people talk about how "something" fell from outer space.
But still, where in outer space did he come from? Somewhere else in the Milky Way? A different galaxy? Nobody knows. If Big Idea can give us a back story about his creature, that would be greatly appreciated.

1. Will the Bad Apple return?
Big Idea cannot fail on this one. They did something in a scene in LarryBoy and the Bad Apple that gave me and the fan base the right to question this move.

The scene in question is at the end when LarryBoy takes off from the tricentennial celebration of Bumblyburg, and it turns out that this was going on on TV. And then, one of the Bad Apple's spider legs turns off the TV.
And there's the big question: Will the Bad Apple return?
For me (and this is a personal belief), the Bad Apple will come back. I mean, she's not dead.

Even though she was flung out of Bumblyburg with her giant funhouse at full force. the spider leg at the end indicates that she's still alive...
-...which would be bullshit in real-life, because who can survive an ordeal like that.
I placed this mystery as number 1, because this was something that had me wondering more than the other mysteries. And I seriously hope that they don't drop this mystery like they did with the red Fib, because this last scene with the Bad Apple is too much to simply forget. I hope Big Idea does something else with this villain, because I feel that, of all the supervillains in this franchise, she would be an extremely big threat to Bumblyburg.

So yeah, those were my Top 10 mysteries in the LarryBoy universe. Hopefully, some of these mysteries can be solved in some way. But still, we can't do much about them, because they're all up to Big Idea, because they came up with the stuff, and not us.

Whatsoever Critic
Sources:
Veggietales
The Avengers
LarryBoy: The Cartoon Adventures
Penguins of Madgascar (TV Show)

Courtesy: Big Idea; Marvel Studios; and DreamWorks