Whenever I watch movies with musical numbers in them, I find myself looking forward to the villain songs. This may sound weird of me, but it's true. That's why I concocted my Top 12 Villain Songs. Believe me; I have so much to say about them.
12. "The Bunny Song" from Rack, Shack, and Benny
This may not seem like a legit villain song to you, but this song has many no-nos like: not eating healthy, being spoiled, and worship something good and sweet.
This was when Mr. Nezzer, the video's antagonist, pressures Rack, Shack, and Benny into bowing down to a huge bunny that he's constructing for the chocolate factory.
If you find this song catchy, don't sing it, because... you know, it's kinda disrespectful to your parents or whoever takes care of you. In fact, if you watch this on Youtube, you'll notice that some of the lyrics have changed some. The original lyrics were: "I don't love my mom or my dad..." and "I won't go to church, and I won't go to school..." But then Big Idea kinda regretted those lyrics, so they had to change those lyrics immediately, making a "redeemed" version of the song, but try as they might, they still kept getting letters from parents... which resulted in more editing.
-Geez! Who's bright idea was that?!
As much as I dislike this song, I still scored this song low on the countdown. Oh yeah, and Mr. Nezzer will come to his senses soon enough if you know the whole story, and what Biblical story it's based on. And, I'll give this song credit for being the number one song for the most editing.
-What would be the moral for this kind of situation? Never put negative in a catchy song. I know that this is Veggietales but... what happened, Big Idea?! I mean, very controversial!!!
11. "No More Toymakers" from Santa Claus is Coming to Town
I know this song came from a Christmas special, but it's definitely worth mentioning.
This is when the mayor Burgermeister sings about outlawing all toys from his town.
-First of all, this guy outlaws toys... all because one duck toy made him slip and fall. That's it! What a jerk!
I found this song funny as a kid. Now that I'm an adult, I still find it funny, but I understand it more. And another thing: this song is the total opposite of the "More Toymakers" song sung by the Kringles earlier in the special (in case you didn't know that).
Anyway, this villain song was hilarious, and it deserves the #11 spot in the countdown.
10. "Freeze" from The League of Incredible Vegetables
I know this movie is more than a year old now, but it's still worth mentioning.
This song was sung by the show's main villain, Dr. Flurry. This guy's plan was to take over Bumblyburg by (literally) freezing people in their own fears with his freeze ray called the Fear-Dar.
-If you saw the movie, then you'll recognize the symbolism.
I gotta say: this song was pretty catchy. Although the song was brief, and it didn't pass 2 minutes, it was okay.
-Note to self: do a review on The League of Incredible Vegetables.
9. "We Hate The Sun" from Rock-A-Doodle
Considered one of Don Bluth's movie-flops, this movie had this underrated villain simply known as the Grand Duke of Owls. During the movie, the Duke plays a huge organ and plots his evil plan in front of his henchmen, who are no more than his followers that'll believe anything that he says.
-Neat.
The only problem with this song is one, the song is too short; and two, the Duke's henchmen do most of the singing, instead of him.
-Dude, here's your shot at making your evil deeds sound more intimidating. So what's stopping you, Duke?
Anyways, the song was kinda catchy. In fact, I know most of the song by heart...
-I found myself mumming this song one time... Awkward!
8. "The Temptation Song" from LarryBoy and the Bad Apple
I found this song to be very symbolic... not in a good way.
The Bad Apple sings about how she'll take over Bumblyburg using her seductive charm and her manipulation. Oh, wait. I tell a lie: she sings about her plan through knock-knock jokes and referring to the story of the Three Little Pigs.
-Aren't you supposed to take this evil stuff seriously, Apple?
Anyway, this song deserved the #8 spot in the countdown. Not the perfect villain song in the world, but a clichéd song that anyone will "Okay" to.
7. "Porpoise Power Ballad" from The Return of the Revenge of Dr. Blowhole
Yeah, you can't help but get fascinated by hearing Neil Patrick Harris lend his singing voice to one of the most awesome but (sadly) underrated villains in cartoon history.
Dr. Blowhole, in this song, is getting control of a giant mutated iPod by singing. Yeah, so basically, if you're a great singer (like him), then the monster will choose you. Some people will say that it's a bonding moment for both the villain and the monster; others will say that it's in the villain's advantage and should've never happened.
Anyway, Dr. Blowhole plans to use the monster to his advantage... wait. That would be the other song "Brand New Plan"... which is coming up in this countdown (SPOILER ALERT). This song is where he succeeds in controlling the monster by... singing of his "love" for it, and possibly falling in love with it... (Makes sense to me.) For this song, Neil Patrick Harris just hits it out of the ballpark.
6. "He's Dr. Blowhole" from The Penguin Who Loved Me
This is another Dr. Blowhole song worth mentioning... although the song doesn't go past 30 seconds. Liz Gillies (who you may know from Victorious) sings this song at the beginning of the show. Is it me, or would this technically be the anthem for this dolphin supervillain. If so, then the song should've been longer.
If you haven't seen or heard this song, then you should. You'll be amazed by what the song has to offer for Dr. Blowhole. But as for the show itself, don't expect much from what this song advertises (read my review on The Penguin Who Loved Me if you don't know).
5. "Secret of Survival" from Wind in the Willows
I heard about this song from watching Nostalgia Critic's Top 11 Villain Songs. So I found it in my interest to look it up on Youtube. And boy, was I hooked. However, I found that Nostalgia Critic was right about the song being too brief. (Geez! Why are so many of the songs in this countdown so brief, let alone that Dr. Blowhole theme song that took the #6 spot?!)
Anyway, in this song, a group of weasels sing about how scary the world can be if explored by a goodie-two shoed person like Mr. Toad. Yeah, nothing offset a person's naïve personality like showing them to a lot of scary things and evil, in general. The song is fast-paced; the mood may seem humorous at some points, but it gets more threatening towards the end.
To be honest, this song was so bad-ass, that I'm still humming the tune to this day. (Is that a bad thing? Probably so, because it's a villain song...)
4. "Don't Fall In Love" from Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas
(Now, I couldn't find any decent-enough pics for this one, but this is still worth checking out.)
This has got to be one of the most diabolical things ever in a Disney movie: flat-out promoting hate and solitude.
Here we have Forte, the evil pipe organ, trying to get Beast to not fall in love with Belle, because one, it'll trigger so many emotions; and two, it's such a waste of time. (sarcasm) Wow, what a great lesson for kids. I guess Forte should get an award for being a good love counselor. (Yeah right!)
By the way, Forte is voiced by Tim Curry... I have a feeling that Tim Curry is gonna show up again in this countdown (ANOTHER SPOILER ALERT). Yeah, I was going to put Forte as one of my "Top 10 Most Underrated Villains," but he didn't cross my mind at the time.
I gotta say, though, that this song goes to show that people can be flat-out sadist and emo. I mean, the visuals for this song is shocking, yet the song itself is still offensive to people that want to fall in love.
3. "Eggs" from Land Before Time 2: The Great Valley Adventure
Okay, where do I begin with this one?:
First of all: listen to the lyrics in this song, and tell me that those would be what a long-term addict would say. Here we have Ozzie, the main villain (excluding his tag-along brother Strut), describing his egg fetish in many ways possible- even describing it with his five senses!!! Seriously, somebody must have been high on whatever illegal substance to come up with this Fuck-A-Saurus!
Second: Jeff Bennett, the guy that provided the voice of Ozzie, is the same guy that played Kowalski from Penguins of Madagascar... Mr. Smee from Jake and the Neverland Pirates... Johnny Bravo from Johnny Bravo... he just gets a free card for almost every kids' show, doesn't he? That's really questionable when playing a crazy-and-addict dinosaur. And besides, we'll know what Ozzie is like as a sober dinosaur...
And lastly: this song was an addiction in itself. I'll admit that I've listened to this song a million times, and sadly... it's gonna stay with me (not in a good way). Trust me; it'll never go away!!! The first time I heard this song, I had to go through hours and hours of mental recovery because it was so despicable and diabolical that I couldn't get myself to think straight for a while. It was that diabolical!!!
2. "Brand New Plan" from The Return of the Revenge of Dr. Blowhole
I told you Dr. Blowhole would show up again in the countdown. Not bad for a runner-up.
I found this song very unique, because it actually goes into Dr. Blowhole's psyche. Here, he sees that the "game" against the Penguins is changing, and that he should start from scratch on his evil plot. So he decides to ditch his old plan and create a new one. (Makes sense to me.)
The visuals to go with this song is just unbelievably bad-ass. The song was in your face metaphorically and literally.
There are the shadows, the green lighting, the virtual-like-video-game-looking background,
and (obviously) Neil Patrick Harris hitting the song out of the ballpark.
I'm mean, seriously! He's THAT awesome!
No other villain song can top that (well, except for the song that's #1 in this countdown).
1. "Don't Make Me Laugh" from The Pebble and the Penguin
Yeah, I told you Tim Curry would pop up again on this countdown. That's right! A song about domestic violence gets the #1 spot on the countdown. Why?
First of all: listen to the song's lyrics, and tell me that that's being abusive towards the woman.
Here we have the villain Drake wanting the girl Marina to marry him instead of the movie's hero. He says that if she doesn't choose him, then she's just good as dead. (sarcasm) How's that for a romantic gesture?
Second: look at the choreography to go with this song.
It's like Drake is hurting Marina at one point, but then tries to be romantic by dancing so graceful, but then it's back to being so rough on her!
WTF!
Lastly: the colors in this musical number change. That's right: the colors of the characters and the scenery change over and over. Gee, that reminds me of the color-changing visuals of "The Rumor Weed Song" from LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed.
But then again, The Pebble and the Penguin came out years before LarryBoy and the Rumor Weed did. (Yeah, never let Don Bluth influence a Veggietales video in any way.)
For what it is, "Don't Make Me Laugh" was the most diabolical and insane song in this countdown. In fact, most of these songs were, because they focus on the wants and desires of the villains, while offering nothing in return for the good guys. And if they do offer stuff to the good guys, then the good guys will most likely not like what they're being offered.
Just a recap, folks: the most controversial song in this countdown scores the lowest; three songs about hate make the list; and the #1 song is a song is domestic violence in itself.
And that was my Top 12 Villain Songs! I hoped you enjoyed reading what I had to say about these songs and... pray to God that some of these don't stay with you in a bad way.
Amateur Critic
Sources:
Veggietales
Santa Claus Is Coming To Town
Rock-A-Doodle
Penguins of Madagascar
Wind In The Willows
Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas
Land Before Time 2: The Great Valley Adventure
The Pebble and the Penguin
All rights go to Big Idea, Rankin/Bass, Don Bluth, DreamWorks Animation, Disney, and Universal Studios Home Video.
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