"Five Nights at Freddy's 3" (iOS version) Is FINALLY Here!

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

FINALLY!

I woke up this morning and saw on the App Store (iTunes) that Five Nights at Freddy's 3 is already out for iOS. As soon as I saw it, I immediately took action and ended up finally playing it for myself.

-FINALLY!

For me, this game wasn't that bad. Here's what happened...

Night 1:

The first night allowed me to be familiar with my surroundings, which was okay, because I need to know where rooms and vents are at and everything.

One thing that struck me as awkward was the new phone guy (knowing that the old phone guy died in FNaF 1)...

-Spoiler alert if you haven't played the first two games yet.

...It was odd to get a new voice here.

-I wonder who Scott Cawthon hired to be the voice actor for this new phone guy. Or is this still Scott Cawthon, except he had to alter his voice some? IDK.

Minigame #1:

After Night 1 is over, I was taken to a minigame.

-I don't know if it does the same on the PC or Android versions or not.

I had to put Mangle together in that minigame.

Night 2:

This was where the so-called Springtrap bunny comes out and messes with you.

Before that though, the new phone guy plays audio from the previous phone guy, which was nice to hear again, even though he died in the first FNaF.

Now, for Springtrap, I learned that if you play audio of children laughing and talking in another room adjacent to the room that he's in, he'll go towards the noise. There were a couple of moments where I caught him in the vents. There were other times when I had to reboot some of the equipment.

-I gotta admit: the rebooting process can be a bitch, because it takes a while for the systems to reboot.

As for jumpscares, I experienced that when the hallucination of Balloon Boy happened. Afterwards, I could hear my character breathing hard, which was pretty new to me, because the security guard character in the first two games didn't do that.

Minigame #2

After Night 2, I got another minigame, but this time, it featured Toy Chica.

-Yeah, imagine! The slutty chicken from the second game manages to make an appearance in this game... Uh. I don't know any better. Anyway...

The goal for this minigame is to collect cupcakes and then serve them to the kids.

Night 3:

In this night, instead of the new phone guy you hear, you get to hear the original phone guy's audio recordings.

This time, Springtrap is a little harder to track down. And this time around, my cameras dysfunctioned sooner, and the system reboot thing bothered me more so. And of course, Balloon Boy's hallucination got me again, and I was scrambling to reboot my systems.

However, the creepiest part was when I saw Springtrap lurking outside my office... and I made the stupid mistake of turning to my reboot systems, and he got me.

So, seeing that I only made it to Night 3 in this game, what do I think about this game?

For me, this was a big improvement of all three games. The premise; the greenish scenery (it reminds you of the novel Asylum by Madeleine Roux); and the pace. However, I didn't see Freddy, Bonnie, Chica, Foxy, or the toy versions.

-Unless they come in later nights? Who knows?

Overall, it was really fun to play. Right now, I'm tempted to play some more, but for now, I can finally watch Let's Play videos of this game. I wonder how WatchGirlsPlay, BlastphamousHD, Smosh Games, and Smike reacted to this game...

Whatsoever Critic

Source: Five Nights at Freddy's 3

Courtesy: Scott Cawthon

COMING SOON ON WHATSOEVER CRITIC!!!
I will soon post a video of me waiting for the iOS version of Five Nights at Freddy's 3 to come out. I was vlogging every day until now, waiting for the iOS version to show up. See what I have been up to since then! I will have that video uploaded ASAP.

"Don't Hug Me I'm Scared" Youtube Video Review

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

A Youtube video to review today? Duh!

Ever since I was introduced to this video through WatchGirlsPlay's React video, I was curious about the video. It seems to mock kid shows like Sesame Street, but there's also some weird shenanigans on the horizons- but they give them to you in such an unpresided way.

Interestingly enough, this video is at least 3 years old on Youtube with over 23 million hits; and the video had spawned two sequels to date.

So why are people blown away by this video phenomenon? Well, let's look at the Youtube video Don't Hug Me I'm Scared.

Opening Scene:

The video wastes no time starting...

or maybe it does.

-We get to stare at random house objects for 20 seconds. Oooh...

And then we get our main characters...

who's names we may never know in this video... who are sitting at a kitchen table just chilling until...

Writing Pad: (singing) "What's your favorite idea?"

-Whoa. That came out of nowhere. And even the puppet characters are shocked to see inanimate objects talking to them. Well, to be fair, if this is supposed to be a parody of Sesame Street, then go right ahead.

Musical Number:

Yellow Guy: "How do you get the idea?"

Writing Pad: (singing) "I just try to think creatively. Now when you look at this orange, tell me please, what do you see?"

Crow: "It's just a boring old orange."

Writing Pad: (singing) "Maybe to you, but not to me."

-This is identical to Sesame Street. That's the one thing that you can compare this to, is Sesame Street. The shows are identical.

-In fact, the characters themselves seem like Sesame Street rejects.

-Now let's go back to that orange...

Writing Pad: (singing) "I see a silly face walking along, smiling at me."

-The animation is just as cheap as the set-up and characters. Then again, it's not so bad. At least there was still effort put into this thing.

Crow: "I don't see what you mean."

Writing Pad (singing): "'Cause you're not thinking creatively."

-Geez! Have patience on a person that's trying to learn all this stuff!

Writing Pad (singing): "So take a look at my hair."

-You have no hair, except a wad of colorful string that someone decided to superglue to your pages.

Writing Pad (singing): "I use my hair to express myself."

-Then actually do something with it, like braid it, curl it... no? That's creativity with hair for you.

So then we're taken to the window with our characters (for some reason), and the Writing Pad tells them to use creativity there.

Writing Pad (singing): "Now when you stare at clouds..."

-Do our characters understand creativity now?

The Three Puppets: "I can see a hat. I can see a cat. I can a man with a baseball bat..."

-Uh, that's fun and all, but can y'all do something a little more artsy?

-(sarcasm)By the way, that crow looks pretty invested by all this talk of creativity.

Yellow Guy: "I might paint a picture of a clown."

-There it is! Something artsy!

Writing Pad: (singing) "Whoa there, friend! You might need to slow it down!"

(black paint or sludge drips onto the painting for a few seconds)

-What the hell? That was art right there! What, that's not allowed in your so-called creativity? That's really bad when trying to teach kids about creativity.

Writing Pad: (singing) "Here's another good tip..."

-And the video goes on without explaining why the Yellow Guy's art had to be vandalized by the black paint/sludge. That was awkward... and so random!

Anyway, the Writing Pad goes on to have the friends collect sticks to spell out some words, specifically names of colors.

Hairy Red Guy: "Blue."

Crow: "Red."

Yellow Guy: "Green."

Writing Pad: (singing) "Green is not a creative color."

-What? Of course green is a creative color! Unless you're wanting the friends to pick out the major colors (red, blue, and yellow), then you are out of your mind! So far, this writing pad is rude!

Then the Writing Pad goes on to explain the essential to "think creatively."

-By the way, I'm simply going to call the pad a Writing Pad, because this video doesn't give us names.

Writing Pad: (singing)

"Listen to your heart.

Listen to the rain.

Listen to the voices in your brain."

-The heart and brain part, I understand. But listening to the rain to think creatively? Anyone want to try that, or has tried it?

Writing Pad: "Come on, guys! Let's get creative!"

-I don't know about you guys, but that writing pad seems so sketch! Call her a sketch pad! Or [fill in your own pun at the comments section below].

"Creative" Mode

So the characters get into "creative" mode and...

(the character takes the time to spaz into animation mode until returning to live-action)

-Huh?

(a heart sitting on a surface)

-Wait... was that a...?!

(characters dancing wildly)

-Wait. What?!

(the sky turning stormy outside their window, while violin solo sounds more and more erratic)

-Okay, who put LSD in this video?

(the characters cutting a cake)

-Now they're having a cake...?

(flesh exposed inside the cardboard cake)

-Eew! What?!

(one of the characters spelling out the word "death")

-Really?!

-I'm sorry, but for those of you with a heart condition, stop reading or scroll down to the consensus part of this review... even though I'm not going to put up pictures of the gruesome details.

Ending:

Well, after that... scariness, we see that all is calm, and the characters are at the table, just like at the beginning. Then our sketchy sketch pad ends with a... Just take a listen to this.

Writing Pad: (singing) "Now let's all agree to never be creative again..."

(the pad falling flat abruptly)

End Credits:

As the credits roll, we see the same black paint/sludge pouring from a mouse hole, while an erratic oboe/clarinet solo plays out.

-(mimicking creators of this video) We gotta spew out randomness one more time!

And that was... an awkward video that I've ever came across on Youtube. Now, to say the least, I think the video is addictive yet still odd.

This felt like something that you would find in a Creepypasta realm on the Internet. It has that shock value that either worked to the video's advantage or didn't. In this case, that was forced.

Now, be warned, parents. This video would NOT be suitable for kids, because it might trick you into thinking that it's something like Sesame Street, but isn't. I think, though, the intended audience for this video is people that are either addicted to violence, addicted to weird and crazy stuff on Youtube, or both. As for me, I came across worse on Youtube.

So, for what it is, I don't think that this video is the worst thing that's ever happened. There's just that awkwardness that turned into disturbing imagery. Again, I've seen worse.

Now answer me this: why is the video called Don't Hug Me I'm Scared? I don't think the video itself explains that.

Whatsoever Critic

Source: Don't Hug Me I'm Scared

Courtesy: This Is It (www.thisisitcollective.com)

Update on FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S 3

Hi, I'm the Whatsoever Critic. I review just about anything.

I just found this out a few moments ago. The mobile version of Five Nights at Freddy's 3 has been released... for Android.

As for the iOS version, it's not here yet; and I'm... I don't know. I'm not disappointed, because I'm pretty sure that the creator of the series Scott Cawthon has been working his rear off to get us the game in the first place: first the PC version, and now the Android version. 

-This is just a thought: maybe he's saving the best for last by releasing the iOS version last. But I don't know; anyways that's not important.

Well, now that I'm on Spring Break from school, that would be a treat to get to finally play Five Nights at Freddy's 3 during the break when the iOS version finally comes out. And yes, I'm still holding to my promise of not watching any Let's Play videos of this game until I play the game for myself. Although, I was tempted way too many times during the last 48 hours, I still kept it together and disregarded the videos.

-Smike, WatchGirlsPlay, BlastphamousHD, Smosh Games... if any of you guys are watching this, please don't take this the wrong way, but I've made this promise to myself. But still... don't stop making videos. I will catch up on your videos soon! I love you guys a bunch!

Whatsoever Critic

Source: Five Nights at Freddy's 3

Courtesy: Scott Cawthon/Steam